Boo!

Put your scary face on!  I did!

2 Months

As perfect evidence that parenthood is busy, this post is 2 days late.   Did I attempt to start this post prior to the 28th so that I could have it ready in time? Of course!  Did I ever finish it so that I could post it? Of course not!  It's surprisingly hard to type when there's a baby between you and the keyboard.  

Our little Abe is 2 months old.  In the last month we've slowly watched his personality emerge and have tried to keep track of all the fun(ny) and not so funny moments we've been having.  Here are a few from the last month:
 

Cry me a river
Why certain methods for getting a baby to stop crying work some times and not others is beyond me.  We swaddle, swing, shush, put him on his side/stomach, sing, and many combinations of so many other things only to find that he suddenly stops a crying fit once you're standing on one foot while reaching an itch on your shoulder or some other pretzel like stance which you no longer want to move from because supposedly "he likes this".  (excuse the run on).  When there's sudden silence, Matt and I flash each other the "Don't. Move." look.

Bloody Lullabies
Then there's Grandma Teofy.  Boy does he love his grandma.  He could be screaming and the moment he's wrapped up in Grandma Teofy's arms he calms down.  She rocks and swings him for a good five minutes while singing some old hymn and he's out cold.  Out of all the hymns you could choose, without fail, my mom chooses the ones that focus on the crucifixion of Christ.  Without fail, I've overheard my mom rocking him to sleep to "Old Rugged Cross" or "Rock of Ages".  We're not sure if he's comforted by the warmth and coziness of grandma's arms or that songs about Christ's sacrifice on Calvary give him the reassurance he needs to drift into a drowsy sleep.  Every now and then she throws in a "Kumbahya" but it surprisingly takes him longer to calm down.  Signs of early appreciation and reverence for the Gospel story, maybe?  All we know is that his lullabies are so far removed from "Rock a Bye Baby".

Lock me up... I'm crazy
One of the first tasks that a first time parent learns is how to swaddle-- aka baby blanket origami-- and if you don't get it exactly right or just tight enough, then your folding efforts are worthless.  When the swaddle is perfect, it's shocking how quickly Abe calms, but, if you read my last post, you'd see that our sneaky little Abe is an escape master.  I've come to really love the swaddle sleep sacks that do all the work for you and keep him bundled up with the genius use of some velcro straps.  The best part about those (other than the fact that he can't escape out of them overnight) is when I finally release him for his diaper changes.  Not only does he already look like a prisoner in a straight jacket, but when that velcro comes undone, he stretches out like he's finally being let out of his jail cell for yard time.  He sighs, stretches out as far as he can, then gives me the "yeah, I know I only have a few minutes of freedom" look. 

Number Twos
You'll come to learn that some of my favorite stories to tell have to do with bodily functions.  C'mon, let's be honest... farts and poops are funny.  In the last month, Abe's farts have transformed into big-human farts.  The ones where when you're holding him, they erupt with such resonance that you look at him and think "That was you, right? Right?".   (For the record, he always looks back at me with the "who me?" look.)

The other day, Matt was holding him and our friend thought Matt let one rip and Matt stood there trying to defend himself while Abe innocently stared off into the distance as if he was too busy contemplating the meaning of life to so disruptively pass gas. 

After a consistent series of those rumbles, they're almost always followed by the sound of pipes gushing.  A more recent addition is his pausing to strain.  One time, I was feeding him, and he stopped to make the straining sound for almost a whole minute.  Silence. Gush.

Hide & Seek
When I finally get him to go to sleep, I try my best to get things accomplished-- like eat or shower.  In the world of motherhood, finding that time is akin to a unicorn sighting.  On the rare occasion that I can shower (aka "rinse") in the middle of the day because he is in such a deep trance, I try to go as quickly as possible.  Yet, often, my shower is disrupted by his feeble cries of loneliness.  I had to run out of the shower, dripping wet and naked, drag his bassinette into the bathroom and convince him that although he can't see me, I'm still there.  It's like a bad game of hide & seek.  Between shampooing and soaping, I've probably opened the shower curtain 4 times, waving at him, and saying "I'm here! I'm here!". 

Nothing is Clean

In the last 6 years of marriage, Matt and I had never washed our couch cushions.  I know, gross, but they got an occasional vacuuming. Finally, we unzipped the covers of the cushions and threw them in the wash.  As if Abe already has a developed sense of malicious humor-- minutes after placing the cleaned covers onto the couch cushions, Abe has the spit-up moment of a lifetime all over them.  Sigh.


Paparazzi!!!
I've had a handful of people tell me that I don't post enough photos of Abishai.  As. You. Wish....

Ninja

Being half-asian, I would assume that Abe would inherit typical asian (specifically Filipino) qualities-- big flat nose, dark brown skin, the love of noodles and rice, and, eventually, poor driving skills (hopefully the caucasian in him overrides that last quality).  Well, he got the flat nose (although time will tell if a bridge actually comes in), not sure yet if he'll like noodles/rice, but, so far, he has pretty light skin. 

I did not, however, know that he would inherit some pretty Japanese qualities... mainly the fact that he's a ninja.  In more ways than one.

Swaddle Ninja
No matter how tightly you wrap him in his swaddle- and sometimes I think it's so tight the kid can't even breathe- he'll wake up, every now and then, with one arm out.  During the latter half of my pregnancy I had many ultrasounds, but we were never able to see his face because he always had one arm over it.  We know he doesn't like the feeling of his arms flailing around, so we swaddle him.  But then he's upset that he can't put his arm over his face.  Pick your battles, kid.

Pajama Ninja
Footie pajamas are awesome! They keep your entire body, including all extremities warm.  Plus they're super comfortable... unless you're Abe.  This hasn't happened too many times, but somehow he's managed to ninja his legs up and out of the leg slots.  And, with the frog feet that he has, it's a challenge to get him to stay in the "foot" part of the pajama.  But once he's in-- he's golden.

Last, but not least, and my favorite part to tell...

Poop Ninja
(Is it obvious that I built this entire post mainly so I can write about this?)
As a first time parent, the learning is constant and sometimes comes in the most interesting packages.  On top of learning how to nurse, bathe a baby, and prepare a bottle -- changing a diaper was a fascinating new arena of knowledge.

Placing a diaper on Abe is like trying to put underwear on an attacking ninja.  Imagine trying to make nice with a kicking assassin whose throwing stars are poop and nun chucks spray urine.  Sounds like bad anime, right?  Our little poop ninja's greatest defense, however, is the infamous geyser poop. 

geyser poop (n.)  a bowel movement released in such a violent manner that a column of excrement is sprayed into the air--similar to the forces of a boiling geyser.

He's cunning too.  He lays on the changing table with such calm over his face, waits till you've almost completely cleaned him (usually it's just pee), and as you go in for the last wipe.... WHOOSH... a geyser of poop!  Sometimes it's even multiple gushes.  Essentially, he blitzes you with his bowels and, without fail, laughs and smiles in victory.  He wins every time and with the culminating joy and laughter on his face you can't help but laugh and smile with him.  What a pooper.

Guilty as charged... here's our little pooper caught after one of his feces felonies.

First Month Frenzy

We survived.  All three of us.  I can't believe that Abishai is already a month old.  Surprisingly, it went by so fast.  I looked at a friend last week, and with dismay in my voice said "Wait... what do you mean September is almost over.  We just finished August!"  Boy does time fly when you're caring for a newborn constantly.

Parenthood is the hardest thing I have ever done. Seriously-- running a marathon is easier.  Although, I guess you could argue that parenting a newborn is somewhat maranthon-esque.  Feed, burp, change diaper, swing, rock, put down to sleep... repeat with no breaks or sleep.  That's a marathon!

As tiring as parenting can be, it's extremely fulfilling at the same time.  There's a weird balance.  It's amazing how much energy you can muster up to get you through a day on maybe 2 hours of sleep.  I thought I was a rockstar at surviving all-nighters in college, but man, this is like the Olympics of all-nighters.  In one 24 hour period I will have nursed Abe 10-12 times, been pooped or peed on at least once, and maybe had one full meal-- yet, 10 seconds of a smile or giggle makes all of it worth while.

Our first month was one roller coaster ride of frenzy.  Our first week home, I ended up with an infection and a high fever, causing Matt to rush me to the hospital for CT scans and blood tests.  On that same day, we learned that I hadn't been producing any milk at all so our poor little guy went an entire week with little to no nourishment.  Here we were, first time parents, thinking we had the best baby on the planet.  He was sleeping for 5 hour stretches his first week.  We later learned that he was just lethargic and dehydrated from not having any nourishment and, as a result, was losing weight instead of gaining.  

Soonafter, I was doing everything known to man to increase my milk supply-- herbal supplements, natural galactagogues, and prescription medications.  Several more days passed and I woke up one morning with milk!  Thank the Lord! Now, we have a full supply and little Abe eats like crazy.  At one point, he was eating at the top of every hour.  Finally, by his third week Abe made it back to birth weight and we are happy to announce that he is now past that and gaining steadily. 

How people survive this alone is beyond me.  My parents came and stayed with us for the first 2 weeks, feeding us, helping with tasks around the house, and eventually getting up in the early morning hours to help me change diapers.  My mom would stay up on the weeknights tapping my arm every time I'd fall asleep while nursing and graciously taking Abe so that I could go to the bathroom or take a shower.  I would not have survived those first few weeks without her. 

In addition to my parents help, our friends participated in a meal train and brought us dinner every other day during his first month.  We had some pretty awesome meals, too.  Not having to worry about dinner those first few weeks was a life saver.

I have a true appreciation for mothers now.  After my first few all-nighters, it was like a lightbulb went off in my head.  Sitting in his room nursing at 2am, tired and in pain from recovering from surgery, I realized the sacrifice that a mother makes for a child.  You put aside all of your own personal needs (hunger, hygiene, and sleep) and your pride to make sure that your child is provided for.  It's only been a month and I can't remember the last time I actually showered before noon or took the time to brush my hair.  It's all about survival mode and if you're in nothing but a nursing bra and pajama bottoms at 8pm, but your child has a clean diaper and hasn't missed any feedings-- you've done your job and it's been a good day.

We're only one month in and I've still got so much to learn and experience and definitely more stories to share.  The adventures of Abe are just beginning...

Twilight (minus the vampires)

I have approached the twilight of this pregnancy and I am now counting down the hours till I begin the arduous undertaking that is labor.  As I sit here, alone in Abishai's room, it strikes me that this will be the last evening that Matt and I will have that is just our own in our home.  I am overwhelmed by a combination of emotions -- nervousness, excitement, fear, joy, and gratefulness.  In a day or so, we will be meeting our son for the first time and our lives will change, albeit for the better, forever.

It has been such a long journey that started long before we ever got that positive pregnancy test.  In the last 2.5 years, God has pushed, prodded, stretched, and formed me into something new and the growth I've experienced emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and (let's not forget) physically has been challenging, but amazing.  This was not an easy road, but I've learned and seen some astounding things because I traveled it.

One thing that stands out to me the most as I reminisce is that I am truly blessed.  Totally undeserving in so many ways and yet God continues to bless me.  First and foremost, He blessed me with Matt-- a true partner and best friend that has shown me patience, love, compassion, and understanding beyond reason.  I have seen God's grace through Matt and words will never encompass the gratitude I have for his partnership in this marriage and our impending parenthood.

Then, God revealed to me His benevolence.  We are surrounded by friends and family that have gone above and beyond in their generosity towards Matt and I as we prepare for Abishai's arrival.  Multiple showers of love and gifts, providing us with every little knick knack an infant would need.  But the generosity went further than material things.  Friends surrounded us with prayers and thoughts and enveloped us with their love through meals, fellowship, help with housework, and many other ways.  I am blown away by the hospitality and kindness that has been given to us.

For those of you that know me well, you know that I like my lists and I live by planning.  Waiting for Abishai to arrive has been an agonizing test.  I could only plan for it to an extent.  At the end of the day, the date and time of his arrival would always be a surprise.  Today I am officially 41 weeks along which calculates to being pregnant for a total of 10 months and 1 week.  I have watched as the pregnant family and friends I have who were all within my due date have, one by one, given birth to their bundles of joy.  It's been frustrating, to say the least, and I've really had to learn to be patient especially through the physical discomfort I've been experiencing.  "Man proposes, God disposes" were the wise words that my mother shared with me and I've had to remind myself that none of this is in my timing.  As I prepare for our induction tomorrow evening, I am trying to strip away the anxiety and nervous tension that I have about the unknowns.  In the end, I know we will see a glimpse of God's glory through this new life. 


So, here we go.  At 8pm, Matt and I will be admitted into the hospital and begin the trip down labor road.  Please keep us both (or shall I say, all three of us) in your thoughts and prayers.  Thank you in advance for all of the support, encouragement, and love.  We're excited and can't wait for you to meet Abishai (who will have an official middle name as well). 

Here's one of my favorite Third Day songs... let's hope this helps calm me (or motivate me) through those last few pushes.

Walking from 3rd to Home

Today is my official (original) due date.  As I start this blog entry, it is 9:43pm.  I think it's safe to assume that Abishai will not be making an appearance today.  Unless, of course, I happen to go into labor in the next few minutes and have an amazingly quick delivery (highly doubtful, though greatly desired).

Instead, I will take this time to update you on my very last month of pregnancy.  What a month.  I've had a relatively easy pregnancy.  The first trimester was tough (as expected), second trimester was breezy, and for the most part, my third trimester was not so bad... until my ninth (or is it tenth) and final month.  I hit my 37th week and boy did I feel a difference.   All of sudden my toes turned into little sausages, my back ached more than usual, and a watermelon shaped bulge formed on my stomach that made getting up and out of any seated position quite a challenge.

I won't lie.  I'm so uncomfortable.  The desperation I have at this very moment to get my child out of my womb has burned a very pathetic expression on my face.  Halfway through my second trimester, my doctors convinced me that Abishai would come early.  "He's huge," they said, "There's no way he'll stay in their long-- you're running out of room".  We had our hospital bag packed and ready to go by my 36th week.  Everything has been ready for his arrival since the first of August.  Yet, here I am, on the exact day of my 40th week with a baby in my belly and no sign of delivery.

Mind you, Matt and I have attempted a plethora of natural induction methods.  In fact, I even stacked up a number of them on consecutive days, only to wake up the next morning wondering why I hadn't gone into labor.  I actually began listing out what we've tried, but decided against it.  I know what you're thinking... you have some tried and true method that you want to share and tell us to give a shot.  Trust me, we've tried it.  Trust me... it didn't work.  Trust me.   For the most part, I just end up with the same result--- chubby, swollen feet and high blood pressure.  Some methods are definitely more enjoyable than others, but they still didn't get my kid out of my womb.  Just sayin'.

Some of you have asked for more belly photos.  I forgot to take one for 39 weeks and didn't take one today for 40, so I leave you with this little diddy.  I'll take a 40 week photo some time this week.

I will officially be induced on August 27th.  I hope it doesn't come to that, although, I've already started preparing myself.  In the meantime, I'm eating every meal as if it's my last because labor is literally just around the corner.

Nursery Before & After

While I've been busy baking Abishai for the last 10 months, Matt has been just as busy for the last 4 finishing his room.  Matt put in an enormous amount of blood & sweat into all of the little details and took the task as his own.

Originally the room was a buttercream color and we had decided that a light gray/silver would look good instead.  With the help of some friends, he had the room painted and ready to go in a just a few days.  Our parents bought us our crib and glider which we then added to the room.

Paint job, crib, and first pieces of furniture

We found a wooden four piece dresser set on Craig's List for only $275.  Matt refinished all of the furniture on his own bit by bit over the next few weeks. 

Dressers before & after

I found our decal set on Etsy and we customized the colors of the birds and leaves.  It was a lot easier than I had expected to put the decals up and I had a lot of fun getting all crafty since this would be one of my only contributions to Abe's bedroom.

Decals Up

Here are some final detail shots of his room with all the finishing touches.